Glossary

Bear Crawl Average Speed: 7.14 ft/s (4.87 mph) Value based on me bear crawling for 50 feet (video not included).	Broomstick Average Speed: 150 mph Value based on the upper speed of the Nimbus Firebolt. Accio!
Hang Glider Average Speed: 35 mph Value assumes you started your journey airborne.	Heelys Average Speed: 5 mph Value is a conservative estimate of cruising speed.
Horseback Average Speed: 37 mph Value based on the average speed of a thoroughbred Kentucky Derby racehorse.	Moonwalk Average Speed: 2.63 m/s (5.89 mph) Value based on the Guinness World Record for fastest 100 meter moonwalk.
Pogo Stick Average Speed: 0.13 mi/min (7.82 mph) Value based on the Guinness World Record for fastest mile on a pogo stick.	Skateboard Average Speed: 8 mph Value based on overlap of skateboard and longboard cruising speeds.
Teleportation Average Speed: ∞ mph Do teleporters need Google Maps?	Unicycle Average Speed: 15 mph Value assumes rider is not a trained Russian bear.

Bag of Popcorn Time: 4 min Value assumes popcorn is Orville Redenbacher's and microwave is set to high.	Dog Year Time: 0.25 yrs (1,314,000 min) Value based on mode of dog year lengths for a medium-sized dog.
Lord of the Rings Trilogy Time: 11 hr, 20 min (681 min) Value assumes the fellowship makes no stops for bathroom breaks.	Martian Hour Time: 61.62 min 2.7% longer than an hour on Earth.
Millenium Time: 1,000 yrs (5.256x10^8 min) Good for naming generations, bridges, and falcons after.	Second Time: 1 Mississippi (0.017 min) Ironically the third unit shown on a clock.
Seinfeld Episode Time: 22 min **Slap bass intensifies**	Skyrim Playthrough Time: 36 hrs, 43 min (2203 min) Value assumes you complete the main storyline on PC, the only legitimate platform.

Boeing 747 Length: 250 ft, 2 in (250.17 ft) Value is based on the Boeing 747-8, the latest and largest in the 747 family.	Burj Khalifa Length: 829.8 m (2,722 ft) The tallest building in the world. Value is based on height of the spire.
Death Star Length: 120 km (393,701 ft) That's no moon... it's the diameter of the Death Star I.	Eiffel Tower Length: 324 m (1,063 ft) Value is based on height of the spire. That's over 400 baguettes tall!
Football Field Length: 100 yds (300 ft) Yes, I'm referring to American Football. No, not the band.	Furlong Length: 220 yd (660 ft) Horseplay encouraged.
Kanye Length: 5 ft, 7 in (5.58 ft) Value assumes Estelle can be trusted. Equivalent to 1.799x10^-16 ultralight-years.	League Length: 4 km (13,123.4 ft) Value is based on the metric league, for Captain Nemo's benefit.
Light-year Length: 9.46x10^12 km (3.104x10^16 ft) Value assumes light uses the Julian calendar.	Rhode Island Length: 48 mi (253,440 ft) The smallest U.S. state. Value is based on the distance from the northern to southern border.
Semi-Truck Length: 72 ft Value is based on the average length of a tractor-trailer in the U.S.	Smoot Length: 1.67 m (5.48 ft) Value is based on the recalibrated Smoot (give or take an ear).
$5 Footlong (Pre-2013) Length: 11 in (0.92 ft) It was the sub heard 'round the world. Australian man and voice of the oppressed Matt Corby took on Subway in what future historians will undoubtedly look back upon as the case of the century.	$5 Footlong (Post-2013) Length: 12 in (1 ft) Sweeping sandwich reform brought the size regulation we so desperately needed. Too bad the subs cost $6 now.